I saw THE CLOSET THING TO HEAVEN at San Jose's Cinequest film festival. The picture has a cute set up, but little else to recommend the film.
The picture, written and directed by Dorne Pentes, is set in Charlotte, North Carolina. The writer borrows heavily from the SHORT CUTS style of plot. Several quirky, comedic stories go on in parallel. There is a wandering narrator dressed all in white from his wide brimmed hat to his suit. Only his bow tie has any color. He provides the running commentary. The in-joke is that he sounds like he is pitching the city as a place for companies to relocate.
A typical scene has a couple of local lowlifes going to a cheap motel to score some dope to smoke. They cannot afford to buy the marijuana, but the smoke from the motel room is billowing out so thick that they inhale it by waving it in with their hands. Eventually, one of them proposes to rob a bank to get the funds to support their habit. The other points out that it is Sunday, and the banks will be closed. There is then a fast cut to them outside an ATM. The audience sees the view from the surveillance camera as our two nincompoops start shooting at the ATM in broad daylight.
There are many other similar, failed attempts at humor. I rarely laughed. The acting is amateurish. Only the man in the white hat shows any promise as a actor.
THE CLOSEST THING TO HEAVEN runs 1:38. It is not rated but would get an R for the drug usage and the profanity. The show takes risks in order to be funny, but the jokes do not work. I cannot recommend the picture, and I give it just * 1/2.
**** = A must see film. *** = Excellent show. Look for it. ** = Average movie. Kind of enjoyable. * = Poor show. Don't waste your money. 0 = Totally and painfully unbearable picture.
REVIEW WRITTEN ON: February 1, 1997
Opinions expressed are mine and not meant to reflect my employer's.
