peter ustinov , prunella scales and sean pertwee make complete fools of themselves in this unbelievably feeble comedy . ostensibly a spoof on merchant ivory productions ( particularly a passage to india ) and the english class system , it is simply dreadful . a bunch of upper class twits , the ivorys ( scales , georgina cates , samuel west and robert portal ) wander about india , accompanied by their servant george ( pertwee ) . emily ivory ( cates ) prefers pertwee , who is a commoner , to her upper-class male companions . since they are closet homosexuals anyway , they haven't the slightest interest in her . however , their love affair leads to trouble and dire consequnces for george . i have a confession to make - i may have given the impression that there is a coherent plot . there is not . instead , there is a series of desperately unfunny scenes , which don't deserve a description . the film attempts to emulate the carry on movies , but fails miserably , since it lacks the sense of fun and cheekiness of that series . god knows what director and writer gary sinyor was thinking - this film is a huge step down after his promising debut ( leon the pig farmer ) and his follow-up , solitaire for two . one can't help wishing for something like top secret or hot shots ! while watching stiff upper lips - and any movie that makes you wish for a charlie sheen performance should probably left well alone . 
