rated on a 4-star scale screening venue : odeon ( liverpool city centre ) released in the uk by warner bros on june 2 , 2000 ; certificate 12 ; 118 minutes ; country of origin usa ; aspect ratio 2 . 35 : 1 directed by roger christian ; produced by elie samaha , jonathan d . crane , john travolta . written by corey mandell , j . d . shapiro ; based on the novel by l . ron hubbard . photographed by giles nuttgens ; edited by robin russell . i sometimes get angry , looking at the smug cynicism of organisations like the golden raspberry awards and www . thestinkers . com , which exist to discuss bad movies . after a while they forget about their purpose , and just rip into everything they can , regardless of the quality . it takes a movie like " battlefield earth " to remind us why they were formed in the first place ; it's a big-scale disaster that brings back memories of all the shoddy space-opera crap that came out when i was a kid in the 80s . watching those grainy tapes in the early days of vhs , i wondered what the same crappy special effects and drab colours would look like on the big screen . now i know . " battlefield earth " is based on a novel by l . ron hubbard , the founder of the new-age religion scientology , but if the book contains any moral messages or symbols , then they've been lost in the transition to the screen , in favour of dimensionless sci-fi . the story takes place in the year 3000 . an alien race , the psychlos , has taken over earth , and man is an endangered species . the few humans who are not enslaved in manual labour camps roam the countryside , hunting for food and making weird noises , like cavemen . the hero of the movie is one of these neanderthal chaps , johnny goodboy tyler ( barry pepper ) , who announces , in his own grunting way , that he is going to find the psychlos , arrange a revolt against them and reclaim the planet . when his plan gets underway , johnny comes to the attention of terl ( john travolta ) and ker ( forest whitaker ) , two chiefs of staff in the psychlos' security command . they try to stop him by keeping him busy , having him mine gold for them in some kind of secret corrupt operation . humans grumble , aliens snarl , and then there's an action climax that attempts to rip off the death star attack in " star wars " but looks more like an atari game . throughout everything , plot holes and contradictions abound . at the start of the movie , everyone has to wear breathing apparatus resembling big lines of snot , because earth air is unbreathable -- people are even executed by being deprived of their tubes . next thing you know , terl comes up with his idea of having humans mine for gold , because they don't need breathing apparatus . eh ? how about the fact that the psychlos are obviously a bunch of incompetents who can be defeated by rebellious cavemen , and yet they apparently conquered all human armies in nine minutes ? why doesn't terl have a clue about human levels of intelligence or behaviour patterns , when he has a computer programme full of details about our languages , history , biology and technology ? why does terl want to mine gold , when it is a worthless substance to the psychlos ? why does johnny seize terl's gun , make a rousing speech about how human comrades should fight for freedom , then return the gun and go back to work ? ? the production values are just as inexplicable . travolta and whitaker are virtually unrecognisable underneath pounds of rotten makeup , they talk like drunkards telling jokes , and they wear codpieces that restrict their movements . and everything is seen in tilt shots or slow motion , through a pall of bluish mist that makes everything look grubby . although special effects have improved dramatically in the last twenty years , those in " battlefield earth " are a throwback to worse times -- the soundtrack is made up of distorted echoes , and the visuals are a collection of blurred model shots and weird-looking props scattered around cheap sets . the movie is so outrageously , spectacularly , unbelievably bad that we stare at it with some sort of appalled curiosity . it fails on so many levels that it's fascinating , although not so much that i'd sit through it again . remember all that " who shot jr ? " merchandise ? maybe one day they'll also have t-shirts and bumper stickers declaring " i sat through battlefield earth ! " copyright ( c ) 2000 ian waldron-mantgani please visit , and encourage others to visit , the uk critic's website at http : //members . aol . com/ukcritic 
