starring casper van dien , dina meyer , michael ironside , denise richards screenplay by edward neumeier , based on robert a . heinlein's novel directed by paul verhoeven ( if you like this review , and you must have more , visit film freak central <a href= " http : //www . geocities . com/hollywood/set/7504 " >http : //www . geocities . com/hollywood/set/7504</a> it's getting better . ) guilt . guilt is something i felt while watching basic instinct for the ninth time ; the penultimate t & a thriller , basic instinct made my last few teenage years worth living . but i know so well that it's a terrible film , made by a terrible director incapable of feeling guilt . verhoeven went on to make the even more offensive showgirls and , on november seventh , 1997 , unleashed starship troopers to innocent moviegoers like me , who cannot control the urge to see giant bug movies . the pic begins with the most unintentional laugh of the year . a simple , white on black title card reads " starship troopers " -my friends and i speculated that the night before the prints were shipped , verhoeven realized he forgot the credits . is this how a hundred million dollar movie should open ? were the rest of the film that subdued . . . starship troopers is about a group of white , blond-haired himbos and bimbos who all have spanish last names . they graduate high school , join the military , and then , rather curiously , decide to travel to an alien planet and destroy all lifeforms on that planet . the story is so incomprehensible , and told so bombastically , it's akin to 129 minutes of someone screaming punishments at you in a foreign tongue . ( aside , club lovers will be happy to know that dance music hasn't changed in the future . ) one plus : starship troopers contains some very funny sequences , specifically the newsreels of the future . hysterically funny , actually . but the cynicism of these reports left me curious as to whether verhoeven felt pessimistic about the story in between . the storytelling lacks focus , to say the least . the politics of the film are scary . the actions of the major female characters are dictated by their out-of-control libidos . there's even a creepy sex scene : the lovely dina meyer makes out , nude , with the sickening van dien while half her face is covered by her opaque sweater , just the way he seems to like it . i use the term sickening because van dien is the least appealing actor i've encountered in a big budget picture ; all chiseled features and machismo , he even barks a eulogy at a funeral like military orders . of course , verhoeven's probably the one to blame , and perhaps i'm jealous because i'm so disgusting . at any rate , a movie called starship troopers shouldn't be about sex . exactly ten years ago , verhoeven made robocop , which was about nothing but skillfully made and oddly moving . and r-rated , despite its goofy premise . maybe it's asking too much for verhoeven to make a pg-movie , then-he's a master of insipid violence . however , ten year old boys would adore starship troopers if they could see it . 
