captain corelli's mandolin is one of those films that most people can't in good conscience say they hate . in the tradition of films like waking ned devine and cinema paradiso , it's a sweet but flawed wartime romance with enough gorgeous scenery and quaint villagers to choke a horse . it innocuously celebrates the triumph of true love , exalts the rise of an everyman hero , toasts art's ability to eclipse the horrors of life , and at times is even a visual feast ( miramax should charge the greek tourist board royalties ) . adapted from the best-selling novel by louis de bernieres , the story begins in 1941 . dr . iannis ( john hurt ) and his lovely daughter pelagia ( penélope cruz ) live on the idyllic greek isle of cephallonia , where pelagia is betrothed to fisherman mandras ( christian bale ) who's eager to prove his mettle in the growing war in europe . he goes off to fight for greece against the italians ; in the meantime , the italians invade his home island . but these italians aren't scary , mussolini types ; they're jolly , good-natured and even kind . according to them , italians are best at " eating , singing , and making love , " which the filmmakers set out to prove to no end in this movie . let's put it this way : puccini gets some serious screen time . when the opera-crooning captain corelli ( nicholas cage ) -- beloved mandolin in hand -- is placed in dr . iannis' home as a boarder , he and pelagia fall in love . all seems wonderful , especially when word arrives that mussolini has surrendered to the allies . the italians are ready to go home , but in handing over their arms to the still-fighting germans , some of the fun-loving italians get shot . soon , corelli and his men are working with the resistance to help liberate the island and avenge their brothers' deaths . but , can these few men defeat a huge nazi onslaught ? can true love prevail ? don't be so certain of the answer , but don't expect miracles either . films about love and war should have pathos and grit , and corelli's gives us smatterings of each . unfortunately , those glimmers are smothered by incredulously bad , syrupy dialogue ( " i feel i could've watched you forever . " ) and ludicrous -- almost comic -- accents . the performances are all passable , but americans and brits posing as italians and greeks can be too much to bear at times . cage seems to channeling a toned-down roberto benigni , exclaiming " bella bambina ! " every time he catches sight of cruz . and christian bale as a swarthy greek revolutionary ? that casting decision is pure comedy . while it's not remotely as bad as pearl harbor , the war here is basically a nice device to teach us the important lesson of acceptance . we're all not so different ( well , except maybe the nazis , but everyone hates them , right ? ) . greeks , italians , and germans can remarkably understand each other . . . in their accented english , of course , and these cultural exchanges are where the film's painless platitudes come to light . oddly , corelli's does provide quite a bit of gruesome battle footage and its fair share of brutal death , which gives you quite a jolt after watching an hour of bucolic harmony , italians singing happily , lovers cooing at one another , and " bella bambina ! " it's a welcome shock back to reality . but with the billing of " from the director of shakespeare in love , " one would hope john madden's follow-up would have touted the same witty , incisive and radiant dialogue as its predecessor , but this script is made of lead . instead of clever , we're treated to cliché with a thick artsy varnish , and there's certainly a big audience for that . too bad he couldn't get tom stoppard to bail him out this time . 
