great . here i am , writing a review of yet another cheesy , clichéd , ben affleck romantic comedy in which i will probably be flamed by affleck fans , paltrow fans , romantics , teens , and widows . yeah… widows . why ? because bounce is the latest in a string of contrived romantic comedies to feature a man falling for a widow whom he helped to make a widow . yeah… it's our old friends bob and harvey weinstein , and this time they're capitalizing on plane crashes , public relations companies , alcoholics , and stalkers all in the same wicked stroke . here we have buddy amaral ( affleck ) , just a good-old sweet talking ad rep who happens to give a free first class plane ticket to a guy named greg ( tony goldwyn ) in order to sleep with mimi ( natasha henstridge… really , who wouldn't go for that ) ? of course , the plane crashes , and , wouldn't you know it , he happens to rep the airlines . so he does what any person would : he drinks . cut to a year later , and buddy's out of rehab and decides to take step 8 ( contact those you have wronged and make amends ) a little too seriously , and he begins following the widowed abby ( gwyneth paltrow ) , the former wife of greg . finding out that she's a realtor , he fixes it so he rips his own business off to the tune of $100 , 000 , making herself a double commission to boot . grateful as she is , she buys a couple of dodgers tickets and the two head down the eventless path towards true bliss . if this plot thrills you , or makes you coo , " ah , how sweet , " then please go see bounce . now . i'm sure you'll enjoy the paint-by-numbers romance . but let's face it , this is not exactly a great flick . in fact , it's downright terrible . in fact , the idea of being romanced by an alcoholic stalker named buddy is a little more silence of the lambs than sliding doors . writer-director don roos's last project , the opposite of sex , was one of the most honest films about homosexual stereotypes in recent years . and i'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he was trying to address issues of honesty and grieving , but this time he crashes and burns like the plush 747 o'hare red-eye that makes a fiery farewell . the performances are weak , the script couldn't hold up a toddler , and the emotional value is slightly above that of a couple of valium . sorry , gwen and ben , but even that oh-so-cute non-romance we read about at checkout lines daily can't salvage this wreck . 
