# 13th Warrior, The (1999)

### reviewed by
Christopher Null

                                THE 13TH WARRIOR
                        A film review by Christopher Null
                         Copyright 1999 Christopher Null
                                 filmcritic.com

Take a little BRAVEHEART, take a little BEOWULF. Mix them together with a bit of THE GOONIES, and you've got yourself THE 13TH WARRIOR

Here, at last, is a movie that is *exactly* what you expect it's going to be. From the opening scene, where Ahmed Ibn Fahdlan (Bandaras) is shipped across the world for political reasons, to the end, where Ahmed finds himself an unlikely hero amidst a group of Norse warriors, this is a traditional, big, action movie from start to finish.

There's no mysterious surprise or turn of events. The bad guys (aka `The Eaters of the Dead,' taking their name from the Michael Crichton book on which this film is based) are just a bunch of bad guys with no reason for being bad. The good guys are a bunch of Nordic barbarians that spit, insult one another, and seem to enjoy pain. Banderas is an Asian Zorro. The movie clocks in just under two hours, whereupon you get up from your seat and leave the theater, trying to form an opinion about what you've just seen.

And I found that incredibly difficult to do. THE 13TH WARRIOR is simply without thrills and excitement. It's also without any huge negatives that would compel me to tell you to avoid the movie. It's just *there*.

And that's hardly worth getting excited about, for good or for bad. Skip this one, and check out the *other* McTiernan film playing right now: THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR.

    RATING:  **1/2

    |------------------------------|
     \ ***** Perfection             \
      \ **** Good, memorable film    \
       \ *** Average, hits and misses \
        \ ** Sub-par on many levels    \
         \ * Unquestionably awful       \
          |------------------------------|

    MPAA Rating: R

Director: John McTiernan Producer: John McTiernan, Michael Crichton, Ned Dowd Writer: William Wisher, Warren Lewis Starring: Antonio Banderas, Vladimir Kulich, Dennis Storhoi, Daniel Southern, Neil Maffin

http://www.the13thwarrior.com/ --- Christopher Null - null@filmcritic.com - http://www.filmcritic.com Author - Network Administrator's Reference, 1999, ISBN 0-07-882588-1 http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0078825881/filmcriticcom

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