# 3000 Miles to Graceland (2001)

### reviewed by
Steve Rhodes

    3000 MILES TO GRACELAND
    A film review by Steve Rhodes
    Copyright 2001 Steve Rhodes
    RATING (0 TO ****):  * 1/2

Demian Lichtenstein's 3000 MILES TO GRACELAND isn't the movie that you've seen in the trailers, which is a shame. That movie looked like a lot of fun. Spoofing a bunch of Elvis impersonators out to make a killing (literally) with a high tech casino robbery in Vegas during Elvis week, it is energetic and original. We know this because the first 20 minutes or so follow this outline. But after that, in a hail of thousands and thousands of bullets, the picture turns into another gorefest that would be an NC-17 candidate if the MPAA hadn't long ago fallen asleep at the wheel. (Even HANNIBAL is rated R. Right!)

Our Elvis look-alike crooks include Murphy (Kevin Costner), Michael (Kurt Russell), Hanson (Christian Slater) and Gus (David Arquette). After a promising beginning, the guys shed their costumes and the movie turns into a bad spaghetti Western -- one too cheesy for Clint to have anything to do with.

Joining Michael for the ride is Courteney Cox, as "Cybil with a 'C'," and her thieving 10-year-old son, Jesse (David Kaye), as in Jesse James. Get it? Well enjoy it, since that's about as funny as 3000 MILES TO GRACELAND ever gets.

The busy script by Richard Recco and Demian Lichtenstein has more holes than the proverbial Swiss cheese. The script attempts to fill all of the holes with lots of shoot-'em-ups. And, when he can't think of anything else to do, which is often, the director points the camera at the clouds, which the editor speeds up. Cars, especially Michael's fire-engine red, 1959 Coupe De Ville, are shown flying down the highway with the hyperdrive engaged. Don't knock it. It keeps you awake. Barely.

Among the Hollywood actors to drop by for parts is Jon Lovitz -- you know, the guy who invented the Yellow Pages. "It's a joke," his character tells Murphy after one of his failed attempts at humor. You'll need to be reminded of that often in this comedy, which is as flat as the Nevada desert where it is set. Take my advice and don't stay to watch the music video during the closing credits. It will make you sad for it shows what the disappointing 3000 MILES TO GRACELAND could have been -- irreverently funny rather than mean-spiritedly tedious.

3000 MILES TO GRACELAND runs 2:00. It is rated R for strong violence, sexuality and language and would be acceptable for high school seniors and older.

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