# Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

### reviewed by
Chad Polenz

    Drop Dead Gorgeous

    Chad'z rating: *** (out of 4 = good)

1999, PG-13, 97 minutes [1 hour, 37 minutes]

    [comedy]

Starring: Kirsten Dunst (Amber Atkins), Kirstie Alley (Mrs. Gladys Leeman), Denise Richards (Becky Leeman), Allison Janney (Loretta); written by Lona Williams; produced by Judy Hofflund, Gavin Polone; directed by Michael Patrick Jann.

Seen July 27, 1999 at 7:30 p.m. at Crossgates Cinema 18 (Guilderland, NY), theater #18, by myself for free (see review for explanation). [Theater rating: ***: good sound, picture and seats]

"Drop Dead Gorgeous" was a movie I didn't really want to see. I had sat through its trailer dozens of times assuming it was another idiotic comedy meant to appeal to teens and those who enjoy lowbrow, b-movie humor (the marketing campaign focused only on the slapstick comedy, the film's mentally-challenged character and teenage girls shaking their booty). I went in fully prepared to be bored and offended and came out pleasantly surprised and I am now shocked at how poorly it has performed at the box office. I'll still review it anyway.

I was standing outside the cineplex at the local mall looking at the big board of titles and times when a woman came up to me and asked if I wanted to see a sneak preview of "Runaway Bride" because she had won some passes to it through one of those radio contests and she couldn't go. I thought it would be a good idea because then I'd be able to review that movie before it was released nationally, but when I got in line the manager said the theater was overbooked and those who couldn't get in could go see whatever else was playing for free. There weren't any other good movies playing until late and I had to get up early the next day for work and since "Drop Dead Gorgeous" was playing at the time I decided to see it. I heard really bad things from some of my fellow Internet critics and actually thought it'd be a good idea to see a bad movie because I haven't ripped into a film in a long time.

So I went in and had my watch set to clock the time it would take before I found something good to laugh at (hoping I could say "I didn't laugh until 45:15 into the running time"). Boy was I surprised when big laughs came during the film's first few scenes.

An opening title card tells us that a major cosmetics company has sponsored a national teen beauty pageant at the local and state level for 50 years and to celebrate the anniversary a documentary crew was sent to the small town of Mount Rose, Minnesota to show what the pageant means to average high school girls, their parents and the communities they live in (they don't say WHO sent the film crew). Fortunately for this filming team, Mount Rose is the kind of town that only exists in a comedy movie, but that's okay because funny is funny.

We start with a shot of the town's welcome sign pointing out the fact it is home to "The Oldest Living Lutheran in Minnesota," which is a good indication of how this little town takes pride in anything. The joke is extended even further when the town's mayor says the sign isn't accurate because that person actually died and every year he asks the Shriners to "take down that goddamned sign but they never do." Maybe that's a little crude and lowbrow, but it probably wasn't what you expected to hear from a small town mayor, especially the way the comedy is delivered here.

The entire film is meant to be a real documentary on the town's beauty pageant which is a technique rarely used by mainstream comedies, but works well here because it allows the townsfolk to talk directly to the camera and say what they're feeling and makes them seem a bit more realistic. It also works as a regular fiction story in that it's easy to tell what the characters actually mean when they speak to the camera and when they're lying.

The first third of the movie is quite funny in its setup and depiction of its characters, who are all exactly that - characters. The pageant contestants each have their own trait that gives them their comedic hook. There's a girl who has a frightening love of dogs, one who wants to teach the world sign language through ballet-style dancing, one who thinks "Soylent Green" would make a great dramatic monologue, one whose brother is a drag queen in New York City and thinks it's the coolest thing, one who was adopted by an Asian family and thinks she's Asian, and one who can't stop making out with her boyfriend and fulfills the generic slutty blonde role. The two real contestants of the film are, not surprisingly, complete opposites, the best-looking and the only real names the film has to market.

Kirsten Dunst stars as Amber Atkins, a homely, good-natured and high-spirited girl who works part time as a mortician while she dreams of becoming a famous journalist like her idol Diane Sawyer. Amber is pretty bright and right away she has a lot of appeal thanks to Dunst making her cute and sweet in a cartoony way. Amber's nemesis is the rich snob Becky Leeman (Richards), whose mother, Mrs. Gladys Leeman (Alley) just happens to be the organizer of the pageant and whose father (Sam McMurray) is the wealthiest businessman in town (he runs a small furniture store as if it were a cut-throat car dealership). If it's easy to tell Amber is our hero, it's even easier to tell Becky and her mother are the antagonists who we love to hate.

And so we have this subtle battle between Amber and the Leemans who will stop at nothing to ensure Becky will win the pageant even though they have obviously rigged it anyway. Many of the jokes and the sub-plots involve mysterious actions occurring meant to thwart Amber's rise such as a few deaths here and there. That might seem cold and cruel but the comedy never comes across as mean-spirited despite these instances. For example, Amber's trailer explodes with her mother inside and when we catch up with her at the hospital we see she has a beer can singed to her hand!

Yes, that's lowbrow comedy but it works effectively here. But instead of giving the film an ugly, connotative atmosphere you'd get with a b-movie that uses many of the same jokes, it works just the opposite here to keeps things lighthearted and humorous. We're always laughing at the characters, but because they're so blatantly over-the-top in every way it doesn't feel bad to derive pleasure from it. It's that kind of comedy that you laugh at and repeat out loud not knowing whether you're laughing because it's so dumb or because it's actually funny.

A few examples of this: one of the judges is named "John Dough" and is clearly a pedophile, but one who is quite bad at hiding his secret (if his name doesn't already make that clear) and tends to ramble on about how normal he is, such as when we see him watching the girls practice and notice that he's carrying a camcorder which he claims is for insurance purposes, "in case of accidents." There's also a huge mentally-challenged young man who is the brother of one of the judges (who isn't much smarter). The two fight with each other and it's funny to laugh at the antics the "retard" performs because he doesn't know any better, but it's also funny to laugh at the way the others react to him because it's so politically incorrect.

There isn't much more to elaborate on the film's plot, which is probably its weakest point. It's filled with continuity errors galore and is predictable to the extreme, but really, how else could they have done it? It's similar to "Titanic" in that it realizes it's placating to the audience and doesn't apologize. You can't possibly take the things as zany and stupid as this seriously so don't bother. "Drop Dead Gorgeous" is a comedy meant to be laughed at, so go ahead and indulge yourself.

--------------------------------- Please visit Chad'z Movie Page - over 230 new and old movies reviewed in-depth, not just blind ratings and blather capsules.

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