# Love and Death on Long Island (1997)

### reviewed by
David N. Butterworth

    LOVE AND DEATH ON LONG ISLAND
    A film review by David N. Butterworth
    Copyright 1998 David N. Butterworth

    ** (out of ****)

            It's hard to knock a film that has its heart in the right place.

The central theme of "Love and Death on Long Island" is that love can sometimes be found in the most unusual of places, and it's a refreshingly warm-hearted tale at that. But the film's distractions are many and director Richard Kwietniowski's unsure touch is what finally does it in.

Dominating the film is John Hurt, who plays a stuffy and reclusive British writer, Giles De'ath (pronounced day-ath). Giles, a widower, rarely leaves his London home, either to give interviews or do lectures, but has reached a point in his life when he feels the need to do something new. Happening out to "the pictures" for the first time in years to see an E.M. Forster adaptation, Giles accidentally winds up in the adjacent theater showing the sophomoric comedy "Hotpants College II" (a terrific title, by the way). As he is about to leave, he catches sight of a boyish stud playing a pizza boy and, if you believe in such things, it's love at first sight.

Giles' interest in Ronnie Bostock (Jason Priestley) turns into an obsession. He starts a scrapbook (which he labels "Bostockiana") replete with cut-outs of the teen idol from juvenile magazines sporting such headings as "Hollywood's most snog-able fellas!" He rents Ronnie's cheesy videos--"puerile romps without a single redeeming feature"--like "Tex Mex" and "Skidmarks."

And, on the advice of his agent, who suggests Giles take a trip, he heads to Chesterton, Long Island in the hope of meeting the object of his affections.

It's a nice idea, and Hurt plays Giles to the hilt. But although Hurt is good, he can't keep this "erstwhile fogey" from bordering on cliché. That's because the writing and direction are sub-par; we've all seen the eccentric Englishman in strange environs before and the fish-out-of-water situations that are meant to be humorous actually dilute the film. "In America you ask for the check and pay with a bill while in England you ask for the bill and pay with a check?" It's true, I'm afraid. Having a video clerk yell out embarrassing-sounding movie titles to the stock boy in back is also too familiar.

Ultimately, it's hard to believe that Giles has been so reclusive that he can't tell a microwave from a "video player," or that you also need a television set in order to preview the original "Hotpants College."

When Giles gets to Long Island he locates Ronnie's supermodel girlfriend, Audrey (played stiffly by the Courtney Cox-esque Fiona Loewi), and uses her to wrangle a meeting with Ronnie. Slowly--and the film is extremely slow paced--Giles get to know Ronnie and finally confesses his love for him in an awkward scene in which Priestley's acting ability is severely tested.

One central difficulty with this unashamedly sweet love story is that Giles' initial crush on Ronnie is entirely superficial, and the scenes where he comes to "know" him are unconvincing at best. Dudley Moore learned his lesson in "10," but poor Giles never catches on: there's more to love than hotpants.

"Love and Death on Long Island" has its funny moments and is unquestionably a fine vehicle for Hurt, but its lightweight predictability makes it hard to recommend.

    --
    David N. Butterworth
    dnb@mail.med.upenn.edu

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